I am going to stop now...

Lights out Alice!

I hurt someone. No, not that kind, but the emotional hurt by not understanding their perspective and forcing my agenda on them. I was inconsiderate and got so consumed by tunnel vision that I could not see their point of view. I ended up hurting them and causing a lot of unnecessary stress. The sad part is that it took a lot of effort (which that person did not need to do but does it because they are super humans) for the other person to make me realize this. I am sorry that it took this long for me to see the writing on the wall and get the wake up call.

But now I see it. I can't force something that isn't there and even though I knew this, I ended up doing this. The level of significance of affection wasn't there but my blind approach to any and everything being solvable ended up pushing the other person out as they were not really being heard. I did not understand that it was not about solving anything, more about hearing someone out and their point of view. This was one critical error in a night time call filled with a series of grave mistakes.

The level of significance was not there on her end. I should have let go earlier. I should not have forced and pleaded my case this much. But as the title of my blog says, something that was started in 2016 the last time I was in this position of hurt (2016 also had a bit of betrayal and was definitely my imagination):

I see. I am wrong. I am going to keep quiet now. 

I am going to end making a fool of myself by laying my emotions bare. You were an utterly awesome human being, but I have got to go now and pick up the pieces of my broken state.

I suck Alice!